Endometriosis, Babies, Career, and More: Getting It all Off My CHest

It has been a while since I’ve given an update on my health and overall life so I wanted to hop on today and just chat! Some of the topics that I wanted to cover is an update on my endometriosis, where do I stand with wanting to have a baby and so much more. So, grab a cup of coffee or beverage of choice and enjoy!

Update On My Endometriosis

If you’ve been following me for a while, then you already know that I was diagnosed with endometriosis in late 2018. Three years later, it’s still every bit as miserable as it was then, even after the doctors removed some of the growths on the outside of my uterus. At the start of this year, I ended up back in the emergency room because the pain was so bad I thought I was going to pass out. I was told that one of my ovaries were twisted and that I had another larger growth that showed up on one of their scans. Great, right? I actually just paid off the ER bill from that trip this month so, go me! The last visit I had with my fertility specialist/endometriosis specialist was at the end of 2020 where we decided to try a birth control that would sort of regulate it……? It’s now August and I still haven’t heard anything. This topic is actually sparked because the past two months were weird. In May, I was sick and in pain for maybe 6 hours and then I was ok. It was 10 days late. It still hurt but I was able to move around. In June I had minor cramping, didn’t get sick. It was also 20 days late, which never happens to me. July was 10 days late, lasted 2 weeks, and no sickness and no cramping. Now last week, it’s 10 days late, I was in absolute pain, throwing up for hours, and plain miserable. So, this week I will be setting up another appointment to see what the hell is going on.

Babies?

I stated maybe last year or the year before that my husband and I were going to officially start trying for a baby. I cut out caffeine and began watching what I ate. I was doing my best to stay active and just be more aware of my health. I barely took medication. My husband and I went through all the tests and got blood work and exams done to test out our health. It’s been so long I forgot what it was exactly, but basically my egg “reserves” was way below what it was supposed to be for my age. When I took this to our insurance company, I was told I wasn’t eligible for coverage for IVF treatment because I was too high risk. When I brought this to my fertility specialist I was encouraged to go for it and pay out of pocket and that I had a small chance that it would work. Without the coverage, IVF was officially off the table for my husband and I especially since we would be paying thousand of dollars for a “small chance”. I wouldn’t put us through that just because of my health. I know if I go back, I’m still going to be encouraged to go for it. However, with my endometriosis and the fact it hasn’t happened yet (we’ve been having unprotected sex for the past 8 years), I have officially gotten to the point that having a baby isn’t a desire of mine anymore. I’m happy with my life how it is (endo aside) and I don’t think having a baby will make me feel anymore complete. Now this could change years from now but my husband and I have already discussed, if that changes we can always adopt. I just don’t want to be in pain anymore, if I’m being honest.

Career….Where Do I Go From Here?

At the start of 2021 I officially started my role as production lead, which was a big promotion in my eyes. I’ve been asked recently where do I see myself going, especially as I turned down an office job as a training coordinator. It seemed almost like an expectation that I would just step into that role once the predecessor/mentor moved on. But I really enjoy what I do. Maybe I’m sick, but I love the stress and the chaos that comes with leading 60+ team members and having to multitask to the point I need roller blades and about five different sets of hands. As of right now, I want to learn more about leadership and the “behind-the-scenes” of our production process before I step up into another role. I refuse to be a leader that doesn’t know what’s going on when a team member needs help. I do think in a year from now I will be fully satisfied knowledge and experience-weis that I could comfortably step into a full on management position and take control of an entire department.

That being said, do I plan on staying with the company I work for indefinitely? This question was posed to me by an outside contractor that’s been working on some of the remodeling to our site. I’ll give you the same answer I gave him. I don’t know. Nothing is ever certain. An opportunity could come again that would make this job feel like a stepping stone, but who’s to say? I honestly do love what I do and I have no immediate plans to leave.

Hobby or Side Hustle?

I have also been asked what is my blog to me. What does it mean for me when I’m planning out my week? Is it something that I have ideas for and write when I’m bored or have time or is this something that I religiously try to create for? For the past two months, I can honestly say that I have been doing a great job of being more consistent and really making time to work on content. I know that my quality isn’t there yet but, like working out, I need to make creating a habit so that it no longer feels like something I have to scramble to do but that it’s so ingrained I do it every day. It’s definitely like relearning how to ride a bike but I’m really loving this renewed passion I feel for my blog. That being said, it still is my dream goal to have a larger following as well as being able to make it profitable. But for now, I’m enjoying how I’m doing it.

That is it for today! I just really wanted to get a few things off my chest. That being said, I sort of have an idea for the next “chat with me” type blog. I want to share my insecurities about my body as well as jealousy in a relationship and how I sort of get over it. If you want to see more content from me, be sure to like and follow this blog. Thank you so much for reading and until next time……………..

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